Friday, March 21, 2008

Yahoo IM messages


I know a lot of people have asked about my Yahoo IM messages that are displayed beside my name. Well here is a small breakdown of the common messages so people wont be sending that famous acronym WTF??

Calling Ghetto Dr. Phil - I am chatting with someone that has a lot of issues and need someone that will give them objective advice. Sometimes they listen, most times they don't, and what I tell them comes full circle.

Having a Pinky and Brain moment - (If you ever watched cartoons, think of the Animaniacs' Pinky and the Brain.) This is twofold; If I am having a bad day at the office, the sign will go up. 95% of the time, it is my crazy-ass 'boss' in NC that has hatched another hair-brained scheme to take over the world, and I as his president tries not to attempt to catch a case (or commit myself under a 51-50) trying to stop him.

VoluptuousDCDiva - I'm in a basic Diva mood. Most of the time I am ranting about something in my personal life.

KARMUL - I am working on something related to Karmul. Simply hit me up and I'll tell you what's new on the Karmul horizon.

Wednesday, March 19, 2008

I'm (not) in love with a stripper - Catherine Price

I'm (not) in love with a stripper

I was tempted to kick off the morning with a piece about gubernatorial sex scandal. (I'm not even talking about Eliot Spitzer -- check out this article on David and Michelle Paterson's admitted infidelities.) But then I thought, screw that. I'd rather write about strip clubs.

Did anyone else catch this little nugget Monday from the Associated Press? Titled "Man Files Suit, Claims Lap Dance Injury," it briefly recounts the travails of a man named Stephen Chang, a securities trader who has filed a lawsuit against the Hot Lap Dance Club in Manhattan for injuries he sustained when "a stripper giving a lap dance swiveled and smacked him in the face with the heel of her shoe."

First, a note to Mr. Chang: Please accept my condolences for what could very well be a serious injury. If this was a stripper of the sort one frequently sees in the background of music videos, those heels were likely to have been quite high -- not to mention pointy. If this is anything involving your eye, then disregard the rest of this post and write me off as an asshole. (Update: According to the lawsuit, Mr. Chang did suffer an eye injury. I apologize. But as a general point, I still stand by what follows.)

Provided that's not the case, though, I have a question: Are you stupid? There are certain activities that come with risks. Try kiteboarding, for example, and a sudden gust of wind could smack you down on the water and break your back. Go base-jumping and there's a chance you might splatter. Surround yourself with scantily clad women whose entire job is to gyrate around your body in stilettos, and one in several million times, a heel is going to land in your face. Under normal circumstances, she would have gotten an extra tip for being so flexible.

So what are the possible long-term implications of this lawsuit? I imagine a world in which strip clubs start to resemble ski rental shops, requiring clients to sign lengthy liability waivers before they're allowed to try out the equipment. It reminds me of a release form I once saw at a bar that had a mechanical bull (proudly labeled as "The Best Buckin' Ride Ever"). The form -- which was several pages long -- could be summarized by one simple statement (which for some reason I have saved on my computer): "Mechanical bull riding has inherent dangers." So does hiring a woman to throw her leg over your shoulder and hump your lap. Consider yourself warned.

-- Catherine Price

Tuesday, March 18, 2008

How Far will You go?

Will you go as far as this man went to get rid of the life that he once had?

Man's Life in Australia For Sale online

SYDNEY, Australia - A painful breakup with his wife has prompted a man to put his entire life — his house, his car, his job, even his friends — up for sale online in an effort to start over.

Ian Usher, a British immigrant to Australia, said Tuesday he would auction everything he owns and more on e-Bay starting June 22.

"On the day it's all sold and settled, I intend to walk out of my front door with my wallet in one pocket and my passport in the other, nothing else at all," Usher says on his Web site.

Up for bid is Usher's three bedroom house in the western city of Perth and everything inside it, his car, motorcycle, jet ski and parachuting gear.

Usher says he is also selling a one-time introduction to his friends and a trial run at his job — a plan endorsed by his friends and his employer.

In media interviews on Tuesday, Usher said he wants a fresh start after realizing that most things in his current life remind him of the relationship he had with the wife of five years whom he broke up with more than a year ago.

"Everything that I have — the furniture in the house — all has memories attached to it," Usher, 44, told Seven Network television. "It's time to shed the old, and in with the new."

Usher said his life will be sold in one lot, and that bidders should expect to pay more than $390,000, which is the upper end of a realtor's valuation of his house that he has posted online.

Joy Jones, who co-owns the rug store in Perth where Usher worked as a shop assistant, said she liked the auction idea and wanted to help out. Joy Jones Rugs is offering the successful bidder a two-week trial, which could be extended for three months and then become permanent if it works out.

"When Ian came with this idea — because we had seen him go through a breakup of marriage and pain and bits and pieces — I thought it was really exciting," Jones told the Australian Broadcasting Corp. "We thought, why not give it a go?"

Usher said his friends in Perth had also proved willing to be introduced to the highest bidder — allowing him to advertise his auction as offering a complete lifestyle.

Usher, who was born in Darlington, England, planned to open the auction at noon Perth time on June 22 and accept the last bid exactly one week later.

He said he hopes to set off traveling, including a visit to his mother in England, as soon as the auction is over.

"My current thoughts are to then head to the airport, and ask at the flight desk where the next flight with an available seat goes to, and to get on that and see where life takes me from there," he wrote online.